How to Text Your Friends and Enemies

Below, you will find a set of urgent messages I texted to Michiel on a Thursday afternoon. I had no way to mark them as urgent, like you can in Outlook. If I was sending these to her via email, they would all have huge red exclamation marks on them. Maybe I should have sent them in all caps. Better yet, I should get Michiel to send me her work email so I can send the urgent messages marked as such. That seems like the most practical plan.

My Messages to Michiel:

“Hey… What was that joke that girl told us at the bar?”

“There were two of them, like a set.”

“A set of jokes, that is. Not just a set.”

“Maybe something about a paraplegic giraffe was involved?”

“Are you in a meeting?”

“If you are in a meeting, and you think of the joke, can you step out? I really need this joke. I’m already committed to tell it and now I can’t think of it.”

“I’m in big trouble here.”

Michiel’s Response:

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

I finally thought of the joke by myself without Michiel’s help. By the way, Michiel… if you are reading… thanks for NOTHING. The joke had absolutely nothing at all to do with a paraplegic giraffe, but rather a quadriplegic deer. The whole thing would have fallen apart with a giraffe.

Because, sadly enough, they don’t.


About lgalaviz
All of this hardly seems necessary.

10 Responses to How to Text Your Friends and Enemies

  1. Whoremonger says:

    The joke wasn’t even that funny if you’ll recall. And? I was I interviewing-I consider it somewhat rude to look at my phone during interviews, but maybe not.

    • lgalaviz says:

      You don’t even know if you are going to hire these people and you are choosing to ignore my texts for them??? Your priorities are obviously askew.

  2. But what was the joke?? You can’t just leave us hanging like this!

  3. lahikmajoe says:

    Very rarely do things not have at least something to do with a paraplegic giraffe. Especially from the narcissistic perspective of a paraplegic giraffe.

  4. Now I’m worried about the deer. I mean, wouldn’t a quadriplegic deer be a sitting duck? So to speak?

  5. Roxie says:

    A SPEED BUMP!!!!!!! 🙂

  6. debihen says:

    Aparaplegic giraffe and a quadriplegic deer walk into a bar…stop me if you’ve heard this one…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: